My Ding-A-Lings

I’m a comic book fan. A big comic book fan. A life-long comic book fan. Richie Rich, Archie and the Justice League taught me to read. I think it’s safe to say that my writing – no, scratch that. I think it’s safe to say that my world view has been significantly shaped by comics.

Don’t worry, I’m not about to get all serious. I just want to establish my deep love of the medium before I start making fun of it.

If you read comics in the seventies or eighties, you may remember that the most powerful weapon heroes had at their disposal was not their great strength, their nifty gadgets, or even their pure hearts. It was their supply of Hostess snack products. A series of advertisements running in just about every title featured DC and Marvel superheroes using Twinkies, Cupcakes and Fruit Pies to defeat their nemeses. These one-page comics were written and drawn by the regular artists of the main series, so to a kid like me, there wasn’t much difference between Superman beating Lex Luthor with a punch or with a processed chemical snack. It was all canon. Batman has Twinkies in his utility belt? Sure! Why wouldn’t he? I sure would, if I had one.

Some of the bad guys in these strips were the normal arch-villains the heroes would face in their own comics every month, but some were original to the advertisements. Let’s take a look at one such match and relive the glory days of comic/snack synergy with this gem, which probably ran in a bunch of comics but which I found in The Invaders #25, cover dated February, 1978. (These Hostess ads were uncredited – some sources I’ve found give the writer as Marv Wolfman and the penciller as either John Buscema, Sal Buscema, or Bob Brown.)

Thor in “The Ding-A-Ling Family”

I thought Ding-A-Lings were a Drake’s product…

Don’t hurt your eyes by trying to read that – an excruciatingly detailed panel-by-panel analysis follows…

Continue reading →

Posted by Brian in Comics, 0 comments

Blasts from the past

I’ve been reading through my old Livejournal and Blogger blogs, archiving them to my desktop in case they someday go away forever (beware the perils of not owning the site that hosts your content!). A lot of my posts are just me making fun of various old comics, but some of them I think are worthy of keeping alive. So, I’ll probably be re-posting some old stuff. They’ll all be new to this blog, but if you’ve been following me for a while some of my upcoming posts may look kind of familiar. I’ll put a nice new spit ‘n’ polish on them, though, just for you! Stay tuned…

Posted by Brian in Pointless Babblings, Website, 0 comments

Web site redesign

I’ve spruced up the joint! I’ve completely redone the website for 2015, ditching that old, generic WordPress theme that made it look identical to a million other websites. In addition to the cosmetic changes (pretty!), I’ve completely revamped the Books pages, with much more information, downloadable sample chapters and easier purchase links, I’ve cleaned up the Newsletter, About the Author, and Contact pages, made the Sidebar and Menu easier to navigate, and even added a Works in Progress page, where you can keep tabs on what’s coming your way in the months to come.

I think it looks pretty great – what do you think? There’s always room for improvement, and I’d love any feedback you might have to offer.

Happy New Year!

Posted by Brian in Website, 0 comments

Ten Thoughts on So Dear to My Heart

So Dear to My Heart (1949) is the fourteenth feature film from the Disney studios, and, like Song of the South, it’s a mixture of live-action and animation. The animation only makes up a small portion of the film, though – early drafts had no animation at all, and the cartoon segments were added mainly due to a requirement in Disney’s distribution deal with RKO. But enough background – what did I think?

  1. Hey, Burl Ives is in this, yay! Oh, goddamn it, so are those irritating kids from Song of the South. Jeez Louise, Walt, weren’t there any other child actors you could get on the cheap? I appreciate loyalty, but come on. This is the third picture for Bobby Driscoll and the fourth in a row for Luana Patten. She’s not that cute.
  2. Welcome to Fulton Corners, Indiana, in the year 1903. Well, that may be the precise setting of the film, but really we’re in Disney-fied Americana. Main Street, USA, at the turn of the century. A general store, horse-drawn wagons, lots of open space for kids to play in, and the train’s arrival at the tiny depot the biggest source of excitement for miles. This is the first real appearance of Walt Disney’s idealized old-time America in a feature, but get used to it – you’ll be seeing it again and again.
  3. Dan Patch, the famous racehorse (or a reasonable facsimile) stops briefly in our little town, led off the train to stretch his legs. This inspires our hero, Jeremiah Kinkaid, known as Jerry and played by that awful Song of the South boy I wished so much ill upon, to one day own a champion racehorse of his own. Good luck, kid! We also meet Tildy, played by the so-adorable-you-want-to-punch-her Luana Patten. Tildy is Jerry’s friend – or maybe his cousin? I’m never clear on this. Our other two main characters are Jerry’s Uncle Hiram, played by Burl Ives (in his first major film role), and Jerry’s Granny, played by Beulah Bondi (who I am unfamiliar with, but who is amazing). Tildy hangs out with this crew all day and night, but she doesn’t seem to be related to them.  Unless she is? She mentions parents, but we never see them. She refers to Hiram as “Uncle” but Granny is explicitly not her grandmother. But Hiram also calls Granny “Granny” so maybe “Uncle” and “Granny” are nicknames as well as relationship indicators? It’s all very confusing. Disney movies always seem to have some little inconsequential plot point like this that I spend way too much time thinking about. Details matter, people!
  4. Finally we get to the meat of the movie (so to speak). Granny’s sheep give birth, and one of them, a black lamb, is rejected by its mother. Jerry takes the lamb as a pet, despite Granny’s objections, and his dreams of owning a champion racehorse are replaced with dreams of his little lamb, whom he names Danny, becoming a champion instead. I know there’s no racial message intended here, but there’s something about the black lamb, particularly Granny’s warnings – “I know the nature of them black sheep, especially a ram. He’ll be into everything.” – that makes me uncomfortable. Casting Song of the South boy doesn’t help.
  5. The incidental music in this film is a little heavy-handed. Every single line is underscored, the slightest motion is accompanied by a dramatic chord. “Jeremiah!” (Duh-duh-duh!) His head whips around! (Dum-dummmmm!) Granny scowls! (Bum-bum-ba-bum!) Close-up on the lamb! (Tweetle-dee-dee!) Jimmy smiles! (Doot-doo-do-doo!) Granny softens! (La-la-la-laaaaa!) STOP TELLING ME HOW TO FEEL!
  6. The animation sequences are gorgeous, but they’re sort of shoved into this movie – they’re meant to be springing from Jerry’s imagination, and they mostly consist of advice for animated Danny the Lamb from a Wise Old Owl, who comes from a series of postcards Jerry has in his scrapbook. (Oh, let me interject to say that Jerry is really, really good at scrapbooking. His scrapbook is to die for, even before it comes to life as a cartoon. If this were set in the present he would be majorly internet-famous on Pinterest.) The songs are a lot of fun, particularly “Stick-To-It-Ivity,” which features an animated Robert the Bruce getting advice from an animated spider which inspires Robert to get off his lazy ass and go and slaughter some more Brits. My pride in my heritage might have caused me to find the spider’s cliched Scottish appearance and dialect offensive if it hadn’t looked so cute when it did the Highland Fling.
  7. Most of the movie consists of Danny the Black Sheep getting into exactly the kind of trouble Granny predicted, and Jeremiah apologizing for it. Danny destroys Granny’s living room, Granny’s yard, Granny’s screen  door, Granny’s rocking chair, plus the town general store for good measure. Granny shows remarkable restraint in not serving up a plate of her famous Black Lamp Chops. I keep going back and forth as to whose side I’m on, but ultimately I decide that the lamb is pure evil and his destruction is completely on purpose, so I’m on his side.
  8. Jerry and Tildy go to the swamp to look for bees – long story – and they find a complete cow skeleton, stripped to the bone. An entire cow skeleton, just lying there on the ground. Tildy is freaked out, since she’s been warned again and again about how dangerous the swamp is and also WHAT THE HELL LIVES IN AN INDIANA SWAMP THAT CAN SKELETONIZE A COW but Jerry is all, “Whatever. I’m following a bee. You can come or not.” I wish I could say it’s bad-ass, but coming from Jerry it just reads as slack-jawed vapidity. “Huh, yeah, a cow skeleton, that’s OH LOOK ANOTHER BEE!”
  9. Little Jerry’s an asshole, by the way. He’ll be all doe-eyed one minute to get his way, but he’ll tear your fucking head off if you come between him and his lamb. Tildy goes to feed Danny, who escapes and disappears into the swamp. Jerry rips Tildy apart for feeding him, chews Granny a new one for not keeping better watch, and then denounces God for taking his lamb away. It’s…kind of awesome. My liking of this kid is growing faster than Annette Funicello’s sweater size. (That’s a Mickey Mouse Club joke. Look it up, kids.) Granny – and the narrative of the film – aren’t down with the blasphemy, and she gives him a severe spiritual smack-down. Jerry relents, promising God that if He returns Danny, Jerry will abandon his dreams of winning a blue ribbon at the County Fair. (That’s been the main plot of the movie this whole time. Sorry I haven’t mentioned it before.) Granny is touched by this, and when Danny is found, she tells Jerry that she promised God that if Danny was found, they would go to the Fair, and since she’s older she’s the one who has to keep her promise. As an atheist, I don’t really get the whole religion thing, but that seems like a dubious doctrinal lesson for a parental guardian to impart. It’s okay to break your promise to God, as long as it was a really, really cute promise.
  10. They go to the fair, and Danny doesn’t win the blue ribbon. I’m really hoping he’ll go on a rampage and raze the whole ring to the ground while Jerry screams and cries and blames everyone else for his problems (and really, their behavior throughout the entire movie thus far suggest that’s exactly what should happen), but alas. They take their loss with dignity, and the judges give him a special award, a big pink ribbon. It feels a little “Everybody Gets a Medal Day” to me, but the movie seems to think it’s a happy ending, so who am I to argue? All in all, So Dear to My Heart is basically a harmless bit of fluff. It’s a shame the animated sequences haven’t been lifted out and shown separately, as they’re the best bits of the movie, but there are worse ways to pass an hour and fifteen minutes. If you’re curious about the genesis of whitewashed Disney America, this is a reasonably inoffensive place to start.

sodeartomyheart

Posted by Brian in Pointless Babblings, Ten Thoughts, 3 comments

What Am I Reading?

I am drowning in books. I’ve usually got two or three going at once, and my “to read” pile covers my entire dresser and takes up a good amount of space on my Kindle app. I’m going to use my blog like my own mini-Goodreads from time to time and post some thoughts on the books in my library. Here’s what I’m reading now, what I’ve recently read, and what’s up next. I’ll limit each to three, or this would be endless.

So what are you reading?

Reading Now

The Indie Author Power Pack
The Indie Author Power Pack: How to Write, Publish & Market Your Book
by Sean Platt & Johnny B. Truant, David Gaughran, and Joanna Penn

A bundle of three of the top self-publishing how-to guides: Write. Publish. Repeat., Let’s Get Digital, and How to Market a Book.  I snatched these up when they were collected and put on sale. I’m only a little ways into the first of the three, but I’m already learning a ton. I listened to an interview with Joanna Penn today and I’m particularly eager to get to her book.

Sky Pirates!
Sky Pirates! (Doctor Who: The New Adventures #40)
by Dave Stone

A series of Doctor Who paperbacks from the 90s that picked up where the original series left off. I  mostly never got around to reading these first time around, although this is one of the few I did. I’ve been working my way through the series, and am about two pages in to a re-read of this one. I remember being vaguely confused by it, but maybe it’ll work better for me now that I’m more familiar with the new companions.

The Year of the Doctor
Doctor Who Magazine Special Edition #38: The Year of the Doctor

An in-depth look at the production of the various Doctor Who fiftieth anniversary programs. What? I like Doctor Who. A lot. This is the kind of thing you can read in short bursts, so it’s my current bathroom reading.

Recently Read

Orbs
Orbs
by Nicholas Sansbury Smith

I met Smith at New York Comic Con in October – well, by met I mean I saw him on a panel and then waylaid him on his way to his signing session. He was the only panelist who had started as a self-published author, and I wanted to thank him for his great advice. He was very nice and very encouraging, so I immediately decided to check out his book. I’m so glad I did. Really fun, really strong end-of-the-world sci-fi. If that’s your thing – and it’s definitely mine – check it out.

Complete Chekhov
Complete Works of Anton Chekhov
by Anton Chekhov

All right, I didn’t read the whole thing. I’m directing a reading of an adaptation of his novella “An Anonymous Story,” called Story of an Unknown Man. Being the good and conscientious director I am, I needed to read the source material. I was already a Chekhov fan, so I expected to enjoy it, and I did. I’m glad I had the excuse to pick it up.

Redshirts
Redshirts
by John Scalzi

I picked this up on a whim at Comic Con. It takes place on a familiar starship (almost, but not quite, the Enterprise), and tells the story of a group of lower-level officers who begin to realize the horrible fates that inevitably befall any of their crewmates who are unlucky enough to be selected for an away mission with the bridge crew. It’s hilarious and the central conceit of the book goes a lot deeper than you’d think. A must-read if you’re a Star Trek fan.

In the Queue

The Martian
The Martian
by Andy Weir

A recommendation (and gift) from my brother. I don’t know much about it – a guy gets stranded on Mars – but I’m looking forward to checking it out.

Dark of Twilight
The Dark of Twilight (Twilight Shifters #1)
by Kate Danley

Kate Danley’s new book! Kate’s a dear friend, I read everything she puts out and I’m never disappointed. Sexy werewolves! Who doesn’t like sexy werewolves?

Yes, Please
Yes Please
by Amy Poehler

At Book Con this year (not Comic Con – a different Con), I got to see Amy Poehler interview Martin Short. It was just as great as it sounds. I probably would have gotten this book anyway, because I love Amy Poehler, but that interview put this on my radar.

Posted by Brian in Pointless Babblings, 0 comments